Fernande Brassens Lyrics Translation

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Carla Bruni chooses to sing a Brassens song and the song that she chooses is banned on French radio. She is not only beautiful; she has a sense of humour. I like the naughty twinkle in her eye when she tells us that she has been advised against singing this song but that she is going to sing it all the same.

This is Georges Brassens performing his song.  This is a song in which the audience often likes to participate:

This song deals with the inconsistent sexual consolations available to men when they are in situations deprived of women. That Brassens includes himself in this company links with the sexual frustration of his mature years (after years of plenty) described in “Auprès de mon arbre”. He was then in his final, longlasting but (he often complains) sexless, relationship with Joha Heiman, his “Pupchen” - see also Brassens' “Je me suis fait tout petit”.

The song is the kind of rugby, barrack room song, which Englishmen and some not very lady-like Englishwomen like to sing with gusto on appropriate occasion.

Fernande Une manie de vieux garçon, Moi, j'ai pris l'habitude D'agrémenter ma solitude Aux accents de cette chanson : Quand je pense à Fernande Je bande, je bande,(1) Quand j' pense à Félicie Je bande aussi, Quand j' pense à Léonore, Mon Dieu, je bande encore Mais quand j' pense à Lulu, Là, je ne bande plus. La bandaison, papa, Ça n' se commande pas. C'est cette mâle ritournelle, (2) Cette antienne virile, Qui retentit dans la guérite De la vaillante sentinelle : Quand je pense à Fernande Je bande, je bande,(1) Quand j' pense à Félicie Je bande aussi, Quand j' pense à Léonore, Mon Dieu, je bande encore Mais quand j' pense à Lulu, Là, je ne bande plus. La bandaison, papa, Ça n' se commande pas Afin de tromper son cafard, De voir la vie moins terne, Tout en veillant sur sa lanterne, Chante ainsi le gardien de phare : Quand je pense à Fernande Je bande, je bande,(1) Quand j' pense à Félicie Je bande aussi, Quand j' pense à Léonore, Mon Dieu, je bande encore Mais quand j' pense à Lulu, Là, je ne bande plus. La bandaison, papa, Ça n' se commande pas Après la prière du soir, Comme il est un peu triste, Chante ainsi le séminariste À genoux sur son reposoir : Quand je pense à Fernande Je bande, je bande,(1) Quand j' pense à Félicie Je bande aussi,  Quand j' pense à Léonore, Mon Dieu, je bande encore Mais quand j' pense à Lulu, Là, je ne bande plus. La bandaison, papa, Ça n' se commande pas. À l'Étoile où j'étais venu Pour ranimer la flamme, J'entendis ému jusqu'aux larmes La voix du Soldat Inconnu : Quand je pense à Fernande Je bande, je bande,(1) Quand j' pense à Félicie Je bande aussi, Quand j' pense à Léonore, Mon Dieu, je bande encore Mais quand j' pense à Lulu, Là, je ne bande plus. La bandaison, papa, Ça n' se commande pas. Et je vais mettre un point final  À ce chant salutaire, En suggérant aux solitaires D'en faire un hymne national. Quand je pense à Fernande Je bande, je bande,(1) Quand j' pense à Félicie Je bande aussi, Quand j' pense à Léonore, Mon Dieu, je bande encore Mais quand j' pense à Lulu, Là, je ne bande plus. La bandaison, papa, Ça n' se commande pas

Strange habit of an old bachelor I have got into the way Of spicing up my loneliness With the accents of this song    When I think of Fernande It's so hard, It's so hard, When I think of Félicie It's hard as well, When I think of Léonora Good Lord, it's hard once more But when I think of Lulu There, it is hard no more Getting erect papa, That just can't be controlled.  It is this popular male refrain This ancient chant for men Which rings out from the sentry box Of the valiant duty guard When I think of Fernande It's so hard, It's so hard, When I think of Félicie It's hard as well, When I think of Léonora Good Lord, it's hard once more But when I think of Lulu There, it is hard no more Getting erect papa, That just can't be controlled To get over his homesickness To see life 'bit less bleak Even while tending to his lamp The lighthouse keeper sings out thus. When I think of Fernande It's so hard, It's so hard, When I think of Félicie It's hard as well, When I think of Léonora Good Lord, it's hard once more But when I think of Lulu There, it is hard no more Getting erect papa, That just can't be controlled After evening prayers As he is a little sad The priest in training sings like this  As he's kneeling at his altar  When I think of Fernande It's so hard, It's so hard, When I think of Félicie It's hard as well,  When I think of Léonora Good Lord, it's hard once more But when I think of Lulu There, it is hard no more Getting erect papa, That just can't be controlled On the Place de l’Étoile where I'd come For revival of the flame I heard, reduced to tears, The voice of the unknown soldier When I think of Fernande It's so hard, It's so hard, When I think of Félicie It's hard as well, When I think of Léonora Good Lord, it's hard once more But when I think of Lulu There, it is hard no more Getting erect papa, That just can't be controlled. And I am going to finish This salutary song By suggesting for lonely people To make it a national anthem.  When I think of Fernande It's so hard, It's so hard, When I think of Félicie It's hard as well, When I think of Léonora Good Lord, it's hard once more But when I think of Lulu There, it is hard no more Getting erect papa, That just can't be controlled

(Georges Brassens 1972)

TRANSLATION NOTES

1)Collins Robert advise that the word “bander” is an indecent word that you are advised not to use if you are not a native French speaker. It means "to have or to get an erection". Until now- the 31st of Match 2010 - I have translated the line more delicately, saying "I get turned on". However, I have come in for a lot of criticism from bloggers who say that if Brassens in his characteristically blunt fashion says: “I have an erection ..... , an honest translator must say the same.

At the start, I had put the direct translation of "Je bande" right at the bottom of this page, so as not to offend. There I explained:" Je bande means "I get an erection"Anonymous reproached me ...

"There is something I don't understand", he wrote. "This is a very delicate and formal translation. Can anybody be offended by that ??? (19 September 2008 06:37

After a couple of weeks, my weblog told me that a number of readers agreed with him and I decided to give the direct translation.  However “I get an erection” is an awkward phrase of seven syllables that does not fit well into the line and so I chose: “it is hard”. (See my final footnote)

2) C'est toujours la même ritournelle means « It’s always the same old tune» -Collins Robert.

 FINAL FOOTNOTE: "It is hard when I think of you....."

 These words bring to mind a close friend, now advancing in years, who was a soldier in the Second World War and spent years as a P.O.W.  He told me that the standard first line of a soldier's letter home was: “It is hard when I think of you my darling"- Thus combining the emotional and the physical.

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